KADEN’S P.O.V

I couldn’t bring myself to fall asleep.


Amelia claimed to be fine but I knew her better than I knew myself. I knew every bit of her, every smile, every freckle, every curve of her skin, I knew her emotions better than I knew my own sometimes and I knew for a fact that despite her saying otherwise, she was far from fine.

I could see it in the way she hardly ever met my eyes, in the hesitation in her voice and in her determination to avoid speaking about whatever she might have faced in that place. I knew the guilt that she felt, sometimes when she let her wall down by accident, I could feel it like a bitter poison at the back of my throat threatening to choke me.

It didn’t matter how many times I told her that I was fine with what happened, she couldn’t forgive herself and if she couldn’t, there was no way she was going to move past it. I wasn’t a fan of the idea of her being with Blake sexually but she did what she had to in order to survive and as much as I hated it, I understood it and I couldn’t hold it against her.


I brushed her hair out of her face, my eyes never once leaving her. As she slept, she subconsciously searched for me, her body finding mine and sprawling herself over me. I couldn’t bring myself to move her, I couldn’t dare shift for fear of waking her. She needed this and I was going to be there for her as long as possible.

I turned on my phone knowing I wouldn’t be able to sleep and called Caleb back. He picked up on the third ring. “What’s wrong? You called earlier.”


“Almost an hour ago, yeah, there were some issues with patrol but I’ve handled it. Is she alright?”

Caleb knew as well as I did that there were very few things that could make me ignore a call from him. He barely ever called unless it was important and for me to ignore it, it meant that it was far more important and the only person who met that criteria was Amelia.

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “She’s asleep right now and that’s what matters. I’ll see Jackson tomorrow. Call me before he leaves, I’m sure Amelia will want to see him too.”

“Do you trust him?”

I hesitated before speaking. “Trust is a strong word. He brought her back and for that he has my respect.”

Caleb hummed, understanding exactly what I was saying. “I’ll handle things over here. If anything big comes up, I’ll call you, but other than that, I think you deserve some time off. Do you want me to prepare the guards for an attack on Blake’s pack?”

I wanted nothing more than to say yes. The urge to flatten that bastard to the ground consumed me but I glanced over at my mate knowing that wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted normalcy and I knew we couldn’t get that unless Blake was dead but I also knew that I wasn’t just going to go against her.

“No,” I told him. I could almost feel Caleb’s confusion through the phone. “Let it wait for a while.”

“Do I want to know why?”

“It’s not time,” was all I said. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

I didn’t give him a chance to speak before hanging up. I put my phone on silent and turned back to my mate. I let my eyes run over her body, stopping on her still flat stomach. The idea that she was carrying our child still felt foreign to me. I wanted children, I always did, but I never knew how terrifying but exciting it would feel.

She was pregnant.

I cursed low under my breath and settled my palm against her stomach. “I’ll keep you safe, both of you.”

I had just managed to fall asleep when Amelia squirmed in my hold. The movement had woken me up instantly and I turned to her. Her brows were creased and a small whimper left her lips as she moved again in my hold.

“Amelia? Baby?” I whispered but she didn’t respond.

She squirmed again, a low moan of pain coming out of her. She was dreaming, that much was certain and although I didn’t know much about things like this, I knew I couldn’t just jerk her awake. I softly stroked her curls trying to offer her some comfort and make my presence known but it did nothing in the grand scheme of things and a whimper left her lips.

“Amelia, I’m right here, you’re with me, no one is going to hurt you.”

“No, please,” she cried and the sheer pain in her voice had my heart shattering in my chest.

I gathered her into my arms and rocked her slowly. A tear dropped from the corner of her eye and I was quick to wipe it away as another pained sound left her.

“Baby, I’m right here, you’re just dreaming, you’re home now.”

I kept whispering the same words in her ears hoping it would do something. I had never felt so helpless in my life. I was an Alpha, people from all over trembled at the mere mention of my name. I had the largest military of any pack on this side of the world and yet, I couldn’t help my own mate when it came to a fucking nightmare.

My wolf was pacing in my head, howling as he tried and failed to reach Amelia’s wolf. She had sealed herself from our reach, her wall firmly up between us. It grated on his nerves like no other but underneath all that annoyance was a tightly wound up ball of worry. He just wanted her to be okay.

I wasn’t sure how long I stayed there just rocking her. It was the only thing I could think to do. It was the only thing I knew to do. I whispered sweet nothings in her ears until she stopped whimpering.

She didn’t open her eyes but I knew she was awake. Her breathing had changed and the tears were slipping down her cheeks too quickly for it to be a dream.

“Amelia?” I began slowly but she shook her head ever so slightly. “Please talk to me.”

“Just hold me,” she whispered. “Please.”

My heart broke for her. “I want to help you, baby, let me help you.”

“You can’t help me,” she whispered in the most heartbroken voice I had ever heard. “No one can.”