"Hey" he calls from the door

Go say something! Don't let him take Ricky to his room, going over to them "hey Nash could I talk to you for a sec?" I can feel my voice shaking but there's literally no reason to be nervous!


"Maybe later Ricky and I are gonna count our tips" please just let me get this off my chest

He turns to leave with Ricky and I should've let them walk away but I couldn't. "I think I might be homophobic" I say stopping both Nash and Ricky. "If I am I really need you to confirm it"

Turning around Nash looks at me serious then he turns to Ricky "mind if I deal with this and I'll call you later?"


"Yeah" Ricky walks to the door leaving, and we're alone. "Explain" He stands with distance between us

"I bought a pizza if you're interested"


"I'm not hungry" he shakes his head "why do you think you're homophobic?"

"Every time you're here with a guy it slowly started to bother me, then it wasn't just a guy anymore it was Ricky over and over again. I was fine getting over whatever you guys had going on but I think walking in on you kissing really confirmed it for me. That honestly made me feel worse than it should have, then I just kept thinking about what else you guys might be doing and the more I thought about it the more I felt sick. I'm sorry man I know this isn't fair to you but I had to tell you." Waiting for a reaction I got one I was not expecting Nash smiles even laughs a little "Forrest you're not homophobic" he confirms "you're just jealous"

"No, I don't have anything to be jealous about"

"I think you do, you haven't had a girl over since Bevin and I've been hanging with Ricky for weeks now. It's not fair to you that I'm getting some and you're not. I totally get it now" I don't think he understands because I wasn't jealous about that at all. "If it'll make you feel better I won't bring Ricky here, and we'll find you a girl ok?" Smiling he waves the whole thing off walking away.

That didn't go as planned I stare around confused. Jealous? Could I really be jealous of a gay guy? It's a Friday night and I'm spending it thinking about what Nash said in bed, I'm jealous of him, and

what Ricky? Fuck no if anything it's just Ricky, he's the one ruining everything. Wait...

Next morning I pace around my room feeling like I just figured something out, I just need Nash to wake up so I can say it to him and see what he thinks. This is crazy, this is fucking nuts! Why does my entire life feel like a fucking lie all of a sudden?

Impatiently waiting I hear the tv go off in the living room and I take deep breaths before going out there. Opening my door I see him on the couch holding the remote, he has on sweatpants and a plain t literally like me. Walking out I stop at the couch "morning" he looks over at me and smiles "I was gonna make some breakfast, you want?"

"Umm" I walked closer sitting next to him on the couch, "I think I realized something after our talk last night and I need you to confirm it for me"

"What are you a racist too?" He smiles "if you have a problem with Ricky's skin man I don't know how I'm going to explain how wrong that one is to you." He stares at me and in trying to find confirmation I lean in and kiss him "what is going on?" He quickly moves away standing

up "what are you doing?"

I stand too "I'm not jealous of you and Ricky, it's just Ricky and the thought of you being with him" "Forrest, what the hell are you talking about? You're not gay"

"Ok but we flirt sometimes right? What do you call that?"

"You joking and me knowing better than to take it seriously"

"You're saying you've never thought about it? Coming on to me instead"

He scoffs "right so I could be the cliche gay that's into his straight roommate even though he knows that'll never happen?"

"But it is happening Nash that's what I'm trying to tell you, all the shit that's been happening the last few weeks I think it was me growing feelings for you."

"Well I don't have any for you so..." dropping the remote he walks away pissed slamming his bedroom door. Yeah, I fucked up.

Somehow every time I try explaining myself I just confuse him more, I just need to be clear maybe if I'm not looking at him that'll be easier.

Walking to his door I knock "Nash" I start "you don't have to answer but maybe just listen. I'm sorry this is happening, I'm sorry if I'm

ruining our friendship but these last few weeks have really been an eye-opener for me. I mean my jealousy was so strong I thought it was homophobia" I chuckle "but it's not I guess." Leaning against the wall next to his door I continue "I like when it's just us when we drink together, and you bringing home dinner so we can eat together. Most days that's what I look forward to after a long day, and I never thought about the fact that you'd have a life outside of this place. That wasn't fair, I should've been straightforward the moment I started feeling like this. I just want to be honest-" as I'm talking he opens the door

We look at each other "then be honest"

"I like you" I admit "and that scares the shit out of me because you're a guy, but I'm tired of being freaked out so this is me growing some balls and telling you that I like you. I like when I say stupid

shit that makes you laugh, I like how you hate my taste in movies but you'll watch them with me anyways, and I like that you never judge me for anything even though I feel like that's all I do to you. But you said you didn't have any feelings for me so I'll respect that and get over my shit with Ricky, he's who you're with." Turning I walk hoping he'll stop me

"Ricky and I aren't serious," he says and I turn back around "we just fuck around but Forrest I don't want to be some experiment"

"You're not I don't think I'm as straight as we thought"

He chuckles "I thought you were so straight I suggested we buy freaking games to man the place up a little, because I didn't want you getting uncomfortable."

"That's why you mentioned the foosball and poker table?" He nods

Nash moves closer "I didn't want you to not want to be around me anymore, so I figured putting something like that here would keep you from moving out."

"You thought I was gonna move out?" We stand in front of each other and he nods "I wasn't going anywhere, Nash."

Reaching over he slowly touches my hair "thanks for being honest" he brings his face over and I can tell he's reluctant but I'm not. Shutting my eyes my lips meet his and we start to kiss, right there in the hall between our bedrooms. His lips feel better than most girls I've kissed, I thought maybe the first time would be weird but this feels right.

Pulling away when he's ready to we both have goofy grins on our faces "can I make you breakfast?" I ask as we take a step back

"Sure." Taking his hand we walk to the kitchen together.