When Rachel announced she had cancer, my world collapsed.

I couldn't believe the cruel irony.


I'd pushed her away to save her life—not to make her suffer through illness. She'd always been terrified of physical pain.

We could break up later—after I found her treatment.

I needed to find the best oncologist in the country. I couldn't bear the thought of her suffering.


But she vanished without a trace. I'd pushed her too far.

After weeks of searching, I tracked her to Tim's pet shop.


I remembered Tim from college—the handsome underclassman who'd always watched Rachel with those devoted eyes.

I didn't care about their history. I just needed to get her to a doctor.

When I finally found her, she played a recording that shattered my world.

I'd never heard Vanessa speak with such venom.

Every cruel word she'd said to Rachel felt like a knife in my chest.

This was all my fault.

I confronted Vanessa, desperate for explanations.

She laughed in my face. "You asked me to help drive her away. Don't act shocked now that it worked."

I realized with horror that she'd never been acting—she'd meant every cruel word.

Soon rumors about Vanessa and me spread through the company. My reputation crumbled.

Then came the product safety scandal—someone had leaked internal documents showing corners we'd cut.

The media coverage was relentless. There was no coming back from this.

Partners fled. Investors pulled out. The company collapsed within weeks.

As my professional life imploded, I finally found a specialist willing to review Rachel's case.

But I couldn't find her to tell her the news.

Then Vanessa appeared at my apartment, drunk and laughing. "I pushed your precious Rachel into the river," she slurred. "Wonder if she survived?"

"This is all your fault," she added. "If you hadn't used me, none of this would have happened."

I'd been blind to her obsession with me. I'd handed her the perfect weapon.

I called the police immediately. Her confession was enough to arrest her.

But even as they led her away, she wouldn't tell me if Rachel had survived.

Days later, I learned Rachel had survived. Tim had pulled her from the water.

But she refused to see me. She said she just wanted to wait for death alone.

Those words broke something inside me that would never heal.

I hated myself. I regretted everything.

My hands shook so badly I could barely type. After an hour, I managed several words:

"I love you too."

Words that came far too late.

At the pet shop, I learned she'd left the country.

Tim's kick felt like mercy compared to what I deserved.

He should have beaten me senseless.

Men like me shouldn't be allowed to exist.

I wanted to die—to become something formless that could follow her, protect her.

But I lived on, clutching her engagement ring and sobbing on the sidewalk like the pathetic man I was.

Every day since has been an exercise in regret.

Those years with Rachel were the only ones that mattered.

Rachel Rivers, I destroyed what we had.

In another life, perhaps you'll look my way again.

Just once would be more than I deserve.