ARIA.
"You will be allowed to join us at the dining table," He nodded. "Sheila fought against it so I asked you to stay back in your room tonight," He sighed. "I didn't mean for that to happen. I can imagine how mad that must have gotten you."
I smiled. "Mad? I am most definitely not mad at you, Lyall. I am not mad at all. I saw it coming and if I am going to be honest with myself, I have no place eating with you and your wife. You are legally married to her. It wouldn't make sense that I sit there and remind her that I am your mistress. I tried placing myself in her shoes and as hard as it was, I had to admit that she had every right to be hurt and every right to act that way. I believe we should both stop invalidating her feelings."

Sighing, I slipped my fingers through my hair and leaned back against the bed.
He nodded. "Of course, you're right. But I have never invalidated how she felt. It's you who has been invalidated so much for how you feel. It hurts so bad that you are mated to me and I keep putting you in this position, that I have to consider Sheila first because she is my wife and you second because you are my mistress which I hate by the way. I hate that life is this life."
"I understand, Lyall. I mean it." I smiled at him. He looked up at me. Of course, I meant it. I wasn't lying this time. "I just need to be told the truth. Am I really going to be kicked out as soon as I give birth?"
He shook his head immediately and pushed to his feet. "I promise you that I will not allow that to happen, okay? I will not allow anyone to kick you out. I promise. I just have to work things out, you know? I can't just make that happen. I don't know how to make that possible but I will."
"How? By stalling getting me pregnant?"
He laughed and shook his head again. "That can not happen. I have just a year left to give the throne an heir and the elders are pushing for it because the Lycan Confederate is planning to send another King when I finally step down—" he facepalmed. "I shouldn't be doing this, you know? I shouldn't be telling you what's happening. I can't even say these words to Sheila because she would be hurt terribly and reminded that I would be making you have a baby for me. She's adamant about it and only agreeing to this because I am on the verge of stepping down and she wouldn't want that."

I looked down at my fingers and sighed. Of course, he was doing all of these because he had no choice. But my mind refused to understand. I was being irrational right now but reality kept slapping me in the face.
"It's fine," I said even if it wasn't. "It's totally fine."
He slipped into the bed and watched me like he was waiting for me to pull away from him. But I didn't. Instead, I moved towards him and slipped my arms around his body, cocooning myself in his warmth and closing my eyes as his scent engulfed me.
"I wish things were different," He began, his voice low and gruff. "I wished I had found you first. I wished you had been sold to me before I married Sheila. Stupid as it might sound, I would have loved for that to happen. I gave up hope because the elders kept reminding me that I had to find a wife or I was going to hand it over to someone else. Sheila was a really good friend of mine and she lost her mate years ago on the day of their marriage. A war had broken out and he was killed on his way to their secret wedding before they could elope. She suffered for years, grieving his death. Uhm, we met at this tavern when I traveled for a summit at the Lycan Confederate. She was there with someone who had promised to marry her and found his mate on the same day. He had abandoned her but she still looked unaffected by it," He laughed. "We became fast friends. Two people who had no mates. We became really close and she was always rooting for me and telling me I was going to find the one for me. Even made a promise to get married to me if I didn't find my mate. Well, the next year, the elders started to pester me and I had no options. I'd been stalling for a long time. Sheila agreed to marry me. I mean, she asked me to marry her for the sake of keeping my throne. That was how much she cared for our friendship. I mean, who was I to turn her down? I needed it! So we got married the next week. Five years passed and I never found the woman for me. Until that night when I felt your presence.”

“I knew you were the one. I knew I had found my mate but I was deeply saddened. I tried to stop my wolf from gravitating to you because it was too late. I would have turned away from you and walked back to the party. I would have ignored the feeling but I couldn't. My conscience was at war with me and I did what I shouldn't have done. I came to you and I kissed you. You consumed me. As soon as your skin touched mine, as soon as your lips touched mine, I felt alive. The whole time, I believed I was dead. Do you know that? I thought I had died or something then I resurrected on that night and after I left, I could barely get you out of my head. Even up till now, I still can't move on if I want to. I know Sheila thinks I am lying about this whole breeding of a thing, but I expected her to understand better than me because she was once in love."
"Do you think she's afraid?" I finally asked. He turned to me with raised brows and I shrugged. "What if she's afraid of losing you not because she loves you but because she doesn't want to be alone?"
He shrugged. "I know she is afraid to lose me. And I think she's just attached. I feel the same way. I would be sad if she left but not because I was in love with her but because I was attached. Living with someone for years, sharing body fluids and sleeping in the same bed can do things to alter your brain chemistry. I am not in love with her but I can feel it, you know? I can feel that we are close but it would be easier for me to cut her off than for her to cut me off." He laughed. "I am forever grateful to her for saving me from losing the throne and I know she's going to use that against me if I finally leave her because I know I would."
I felt slightly relieved that he had said that. That meant I didn't have to lose hope. He still loved and cared about me. He was doing all of that because Sheila had been good to him. I could see it now. I couldn't even bring myself to hate her if I tried to. It was going to make me feel extremely guilty.
"I understand, Lyall," I said, stroking his hair with my fingers. "I just don't like it when you have to lie. I know it's something you have to do for now but it's not as easy as you make it seem, you know? It's not so easy to just understand without my emotions getting in the way. Even if I try to uhm... understand, there are some days that I would be unable to no matter how much I tried. I just need you to know that I want to be with you and it's not easy on me to see you with another woman when you should be with me."
"So you were mad that I didn't ask for you to join us at the table for breakfast?" He whispered against my hair as his lips grazed my skin.
I could barely compose coherent words but I knew this one had to get out. "At first, I was. Then later, I was happy not to even be invited. It would have been really uncomfortable for us all and I wasn't ready to experience that."
His hand slid around my waist. "That's going to change tomorrow. I just have to convince her enough to agree."
"But what happened to me for lunch?"
He laughed. "You don't want to be alone with her, do you? You both would bite your heads off. Besides, I won't be around for lunch because I have a meeting. Just join us for breakfast—"
A knock sounded on the door, interrupting our conversation.