ARIA.
We rode past brooks and mountains. I hadn't seen the vista since I came here but I saw it as we rode past the serpentine. We watched the moon from one of the cliffs Lyall called his favorite place.
"Have you been here with anyone else?" I asked just as we stopped on another cliff. This one was higher than the one he had shown me first and down below, we could see the forest in its thick glory, the lake glistening under the moonlight and the stars. It was far more beautiful than I'd imagined.

"Why do you ask?" He replied, throwing a stone far into the thick of the woods. The sound of leaves parting as the stone tore through the woods floated back to our ears.
I shrugged. "For you to bring me here, it seems like something special. Something you wouldn't just do for anyone."
"So why do you think I have been here with someone else?"
"I don't think you have been here with someone else." I reply, hating that he can read me so well. "I just asked a question."
"And didn't that pass through your thought process before you said the words out of your mouth?"
I am left speechless. I fucking hate that he is right. Why does he have to be right with everything? Can't I just ask my questions without being avoidant?

"I guess you're right," I reply finally, hating that I have to admit to that fact. "I thought about it before I asked."
He turned to face me full-on, smiling softly. "Who do you think I have been here with?"
I shrugged, fiddling with my dress and tearing my eyes away from him. Suddenly, the moon looks more than beautiful. I watch the current and tide of the lake, suddenly very much interested in how they came to be.
"If you keep quiet, I won't know what's boggling you, Aria," He replied again. "So speak, now that is the right time. Because if you don't, I might not like it if you bring it up at the wrong time."

"I just wanted to know if you've been here with her."
"Who?" He asked. I could hear the rise and fall of his breath as he drew close to me.
"Your wife."
He went silent for a moment, before breathing heavily and looking up to the skies. "Sheila and I were really close but not close enough for us to bond emotionally. Of course, she was supportive of me, guiding me through the dark and all of that, that is all we'll ever be. Similar to best friends. I hope you understand that."
Of course, I did. I would have understood fully if he wasn't married to her or sleeping in the same bed as her. The knowledge alone settled badly in the pit of my belly.
Lyall slipped his arms around my waist, pulling me into him and placing his chin on my forehead. We remained in silence, basking in the moment and the beauty of silence.
"I care about you so much, Aria," he said finally. "You don't even know how much I care about you. I don't think you do. It's why you believe I don't give a fuck about you because I am married. Every day, I remain awake in bed, thinking about you and how to make this work, you know? And every fucking time, I am always ending up at a dead end, not knowing what next to do. The odds and evens are against me and I feel like I am at the crossroads but this time, I am not battling with which choice to make. A whole lot of people want me going in one direction, where my heart isn't."
My heart sank. I hated having to hear this because it brought me to my knees. It made me hate the fact that I didn't find the King soon enough. I mean, things would have worked out at the time. But here I was, pining for a man who belonged to another even if he rightfully belonged to another.
Sighing, I tried to retain a cheerful resolve even if I was breaking down on the insides and hating why my life had to turn out this way.
Taking his hand in mine, I slipped my fingers through his, squeezing reassuringly before turning to look at him with a smile on my face. "I understand, Lyall. All of this is out of your control. Sadly, we are unable to do anything about it."
He squeezed my hand in return and nodded. "You're right, Aria. I hate that this is happening. I want you. I want you terribly. I literally hate everyone now because they don't support you being my mistress. I wished they'd know that you are not my mistress but the fucking love of my life."
My eyes widened slightly as he said those last words and I gulped, not knowing what to say in reply to that. My whole skin began to sing as shivers ran down my spine. The beautiful type of shivers. He called me the love of his life. Lyall just called me the love of his life!
"D-did you just say that I am the love of your life?"
He pressed his nose into my neck, inhaling for a long time and exhaling really slowly like he was retaining my life's essence.
"Yes, Aria. You are the love of my life. I have known that since I first felt the bond between us."
And just like that, I can hear the thud of my heart loudly against my chest. He pulls me in so I am encased in the strength of his bulky arms. "You're the only woman I want, Aria. The only woman who has ever made me feel more than just lust, physical attraction and the need to actually satisfy my urges. I want to show you a whole lot of things. I don't just want to be married to you. I want to take you down the lane of my life, I want you to become a part of me, entwined like threads sewn into intricate patterns. Do you even know how you make me feel?"
I turned to face him, my eyes alight with so much desire for him. "What about you, do you know how you make me feel?"
"I like to think that I do, Aria." He replied, grazing my skin with his thumb. His fingers pressed into my lips, lingering for a long time as he stared into my eyes. I could literally feel the love oozing from him, the feelings that transcended mere desire. We felt like star-crossed lovers, destined to meet once again.
"I do," I replied. "I love you. It's more than just love, Lyall. Sometimes, I hate that things have to go this way but I mean, what's the meaning of life without ups and downs?"
Closing his eyes, he brought my face to his, touching the tip of his nose against mine before he pulled away for a slight moment to look into my eyes. "What's the meaning of life without you in it? Where are the colors if you aren't here to paint them?"
I placed my hand on his chest and leaned in to kiss him. "There is no meaning without you.”